Sometimes you get that rare breed of manager who is utterly clueless on how to sell a job, and worse, thinks that the disadvantages of the job are its selling points. I once met the top HR person of a company for the final round of interviews whom I was convinced was high on magic mushrooms or something.

She started the conversation with “I give you my personal guarantee that you don’t have to take a pay cut to join us.”

Huh? I’m not sure about you but if I’m going to take the risk to leave my job to join a new organisation, I’m kind of looking for an upside in pay.

Shortly after, she gave this example disguised as a positive reflection on her team. “I was so proud of my young employee. She is so dedicated that she even told her boyfriend to wait downstairs while she was finished up the CEO’s speech at 9pm last night.” 

Wait. You’re the head of HR. Since when does writing corporate speeches fall under HR? So I’m expected to work late to do a job that should be done by the Communications department?

The winner was how she finished off her sales pitch. “We are the biggest player in Singapore, you know?”

In Singapore. I’m sorry, but your annual revenue might not even be the size of Google’s recreation budget. I’m not sure why you’re so proud of that.

Obviously, when the offer came (it was not a pay cut as she’d promised, but it wasn’t an increase either), I said thanks, but no thanks. I don’t want to work for someone who’s obviously under the influence.